Dear diary,
I thought that after the concert, fun in the sun, life would
be better I don’t know why but I just thought so, but I guess I was wrong.
Yesterday I got some money from jeffory, prim’s boyfriend
well I spent some and left some for the other day. So when I woke up this
morning no breakfast was cooking but I didn’t mind because I had some money
pulse I had to buy a tooth bush for I haven’t had a toothbrush in months. I had
a bath and put on my cloths and look in my draw to see if I say my money I put
in it but I didn’t, so I ask who took up m money and mom said she did so I ask
why she said she had to cook dinner so I started to cry because I saved that so
I could buy some thing for me and she didn’t even maid breakfast I was really
angry and hungry and my breath smelt really bad so I knew from that moment the
day is going to go bad I had to eat mackerel witch I do not like and then I had
to wash the dishes I was still angry and crying
so I stated to read a magazine and then I eat dinner after that and then
mom was cleaning the she discover the cat had dodo on the floors she was
cleaning it up and she wanted bleach so she sent me to buy bleach but nowhere
had any and I was angry and frustrated and mom just sent me to was the dishes
but I washed it this morning and I’m really angry. When I was young I had
thought of suicidal but never like this. i feel
like killing myself but I kept
thinking what others would say or think about me but then again I would be
dead, so who cares I really feel sad and if I don’t die I want to leave this
place because this place is causing my sorrow and pain, anger and sadness,
frustration and suicidal!!
So earlier I was thinking about going to the hospital or
homes, so I would try to do something to hurt myself or harm so I can end up at
the hospital or my lead to death I if the rest of the week end up like this I
am going to put serious consideration into this .
Felling: suicidal, frustrated and angry
Date: 15/7/12
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